Body Safety Blog

Moms, remember to stay vigilant... 

Sitting in a car, speaking with a Georgian accent, she started sharing about how she discovered that her daughter had been receiving text messages from her 6th-grade teacher- and they were not overtly sexual, but they were definitely inappropriate. They were definitely red-flag grooming messages.

Can you imagine discovering that on your child's phone? Reading things like "Good morning beautiful. Good night beautiful. How was your day beautiful?" and sending your child songs that are not for kids, with innuendos that most definitely infer romantic or sexual desire!

I wouldn't blame you if you were outrageously upset! And this mom was definitely freaked out about the types of messages she was reading.

The mom did the right next thing and reported this inappropriate communication from the teacher to her daughter, to the school. She found out that the teacher was texting 4 of the girls in his class this way.

The school...

One of the most essential safety skills your child should learn is the difference between secrets, privacy, and surprises. I mean, have you ever thought about it? Do you even know the difference? And more importantly, do your kids?

When I had my first child, I used to think I knew the difference, but it turns out I didn't. And that's okay because it's never too late to learn and educate ourselves as parents. Here's a little story to illustrate my point.

So, I have three kiddos, and when my oldest was potty training, I read somewhere that giving them a little treat, like a chocolate chip, every time they successfully used the potty could be a good idea. And let me tell you, it worked like a charm! But, of course, I didn't want the other two to feel left out or start asking for treats too. So, I told my child that we had to keep it a secret between us so that no one else would know about the chocolate chips.

Looking back, I realized that was a big mistake. Secrets...

Beth Robinson, author of the book "Protecting Children from Predators" says this about how to determine if your child is ready for sleepovers:

• “Are your children old enough to recognize when someone is trying to engage them in inappropriate sexual behavior? The younger the child, the greater the risk when you let them attend a sleepover. Younger children won’t recognize a risky situation until it is too late.”
• “Are your children assertive enough to draw attention to inappropriate overtures from other children or adults? Some children have the confidence to yell or push away someone who makes them uncomfortable, while others are too timid to try to stop an adult or older child from hurting them. No child should attend a sleepover who lacks the confidence and assertiveness to rebuff inappropriate sexual behavior.”
•  “Will your children call you if something unsafe happens at a sleepover? Some children are easily influenced by peers and...

Private part safety has many facets. I'll be sharing more about the nuances and intricacies that can help make teaching private part safety less stressful and more comprehensive.

If you have a toddler, you'll want to check out my upcoming workshop that is specifically for parents in this stage and who are wanting to teach private part safety.

Have you started teaching private part safety and did you know to teach about private part exposure?

Body literacy is what we are teaching our kids when we teach them the names of their private parts and about the functions of those parts. This can greatly reduce the risks of sexual abuse.

Here's why.

Our (as in everyone's) genitalia, unless medically different, has the most concentration of nerve endings than any other part of the body. It's one of the reasons kids notice this very sensitive part of the body when they begin to have physical self-awareness.

This typically happens before or around the time of potty training, which is when they are transitioning to other materials covering those areas of the body (from diaper to underwear) and it makes the sensations of those areas felt more prominently.

As kids develop more physical self-awareness, it's natural (and normal) for a child to explore their body and those areas in particular. We don't want to shame this self-exploration/self-pleasure because it is part of healthy development and builds body...

IF YOU'RE A PARENT WORKING OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOME, THIS VIDEO IS FOR YOU!

Here are the things you can teach your kids if they are under the care of a step-parent, family, friends, babysitters, basically anyone other than yourself.

1- Explain to them what body autonomy and boundaries are.

2- Talk about private parts and how those areas are only for them to touch/see.

3- Talk about the difference between secrets and the difference between secrets and surprises.

4- Create a safety network and let your child know what to do if they are in an unsafe situation or experience unsafe touch.

5- Use things like safety words and teach them that they can ALWAYS tell you anything and that it doesn't matter when something happened, they can still always tell you!

6- Use communication tools (like CONSENTletters™) to let your child's caretakers know that you are actively teaching your kids about body safety.

Check out below for more info on each of these steps!

Sending you love and strength.

...

Teaching consent isn't just about teaching your kids that no one is allowed to touch them.

It's also about everyday situations.

It's ultimately about body autonomy/sovereignty!

So how can you teach your kids? By using every opportunity through everyday situations.

Check out this video where I give 3 examples of how I did just that!

Need more ways to teach your kids about body safety? Download my free guide.

Get the "7 Ways To Teach Your Kid(s) Body Safety, Boundaries and Consent" by clicking here.

I'm so excited to share that my podcast is live!

Have a listen here. But I also invite you to watch over on my podcast website www.aboutconsent.com

If you enjoy it, I invite you to leave a ratings and review on iTunes. 

Or come back here and comment below with your feedback and thoughts!

With gratitude,

Rosalia~